Mk3 Cavalier Owners Club | Vauxhall Cavalier Dot Com

Lowrider Dave’s Garage presents to you: Cavalier number 3 (aka: Archer).

Bought on the 3rd of January 2016, Archer is a Satin Red 1994 GLS powered by a 2.0 C20NE engine mated to a manual F16 gearbox. Although I have Pedro to use as a commuting car, automatics aren’t really my thing, so I have been idly looking out for a commuting car for myself (especially as the Auto is likely to be sold this year). The GLS goes against my better mileage judgement as I prefer cars with less than 90-100k on the clock - Archer has 135k. Even so, I talked £150 off the asking price and early January found the missus and I heading into deepest Essex to collect Archer for me and a puppy for her - the puppy didn’t come with the car it was a separate deal and one I used to lever my way into getting another Cavalier.

Infuriatingly, the tax code required for DVLA ‘over the phone’ taxing was a digit short due to being an old style V5C, I throw caution to the wind and head anti-clockwise round the M25 sans valid tax (but on the correct side of the road to avoid unnecessary head on collisions) to reel off the 120 miles towards home. A wobble at the higher speeds saw me cautiously keep to about 60 and therefore passed by cars, lorries and an OAP on a motorability scooter chasing a tortoise. Thankfully I got home without incident. With work getting in the way, I managed to find a hour free to take it my local tyre place who promptly pointed out that both fronts has worn with negative camber which would be part of the ‘wobbly’ problem. They put new boots on as the originals were close to 2mm, but couldn’t alter the camber due to rusted nuts (phrasing).

A call to my friendly independent garage afforded me the opportunity to inspect the car on the ramp. This proved invaluable as I could assess the underside properly and could see it was in very good condition, the only bad points were the coil spring plates which - although serviceable - showed signs of corrosion. Offside rear arch isn’t too bad but could do with replacement and the nearside isn’t bad at all. For a ‘blind’ purchase I, more or less, dropped lucky. Now feast on photos, you lucky peasants.


Pray silence and welcome: Archer.




Disappointing arse shot. Car also came equipped with gypsy bewitching hook/shed dragger. I got 99 problem and the toe hook is one…



Upon closer inspection, I have a natty collection of window stickers to make any OAP envious…



A sweep of the interior gave up dubious booty: a Cavalier mk2 manual (wtf?), one black glove, a cassette featuring an Irish ‘singer’, an unused cheap-tastic air freshener and three sunglasses (one broken) all of which were highly fashionable in the mid-70s when Jimmy Savile wore them.



Old school stylee radio/cassette. Does not seem to work so will be filed under B for Bin.



The 'Mysterious Glowing Orange Light of Unknown Reasoning'.

Lovingly knackered gearstick gater, more cracked than Donald Trump's brain.



Foglight wiring in place - win.



The car has also seen some bitching ghetto modifications…




A Sparkrite alarm, oh so cutting edge electrical equipment. And dead. Might ebay for the laugh of it if I can work out how to de-wire the snakes nest of spaghetti wires.



Hardcore bare bottom shot…you filthy animals.



Rub my hands along your relatively firm sills… phwoar!

Hello? Guinness Book of records? Yes, I actually have a dry Cavalier engine…STOP LAUGHING!



Cocked a leg up for some attention…



Filth beast! One metric arseload of dirt right there…



…and here.



Now here…adorning the garage floor in a particularly Jackson Pollock way.



Betterer. Plan to get the pressure hose out soon anyway.



BEHOLD! The mighty C20NE!



Quake at the dirty oil cap! Wince at the scabby rocker cover! Tut at the crusty thermostat housing! Sigh at the hyperbole and exclaimation marks!

This bulb may be broken. As broken as Government promises and my mental state.



This may be dirty (like your sister)



Filthy, like your…yeah, yeah, you get it.



After 25 minutes at Gas Mark 4 (turn occassionally to release the juices) and serve with a sprig of pasley on baby new potatoes a la julienne…


More drug enduced updates soon…

Absolutely fking pissing myself at your witty comments and remarks...
"As cracked as Donald Trump's brain"

"gypsy bewitching hook/shed dragger. " hahaha wtf lol.

Well I see you've got another filthy little biatch to clean up and get your fingernails dirty over, congratulations. Looks fairly tidy, after a deep clean and polish and some hub caps I'm sure she'll look the business!

Must admit, I am amazed to see a dry C20NE sump. Must be a first.. Does that mean it's been towed everywhere for 135.000 miles then? lol.

Nice cavalier, plenty of little bits to keep you busy. So what does that orange light do?

Great write up Dave!

Looks to be a good runner you've got yourself there.

Good job getting rid of all that muck. I trust you did the same with "another fifty favourite songs"?! Perhaps we should contact T.C. Records with a view to obtaining the original fifty?

But what of the V6?!

Diggin' that tailgate strap - did it come with its own set of clothes pegs?

You could stop - anywhere - wash your socks'n'skids and have them dry in no time

Dave - is this that NE that you were asking us about?

It don't look that bad a car. Any plans for it? Remember if you need some parts I've got my diplomat for spairs.

Greig

But you are sooooo far away Greig!

colin1 wrote:Dave - is this that NE that you were asking us about?

Yes.

Greig Sri wrote:Any plans for it?

All will be revealed...

Found any gerbils hiding in the trunk yet?

lowrider dave wrote:But you are sooooo far away Greig!

Courier stuff or road trip to get it. I've done some road trips in the past to pick up stuff.

Greig

All righty then....

Dags and cars, was it from a pikey site as I fkn hate pikeys

Suppose you would of got the purchase price back in Moody gold too as we all know pikeys love dags and moody gold

Cavalier342 wrote:Found any gerbils hiding in the trunk yet?

What is it with you and gerbils?!!

Mikebmth wrote:All righty then....
Dags and cars, was it from a pikey site as I fkn hate pikeys
Suppose you would of got the purchase price back in Moody gold too as we all know pikeys love dags and moody gold

Hahahahaaahahhaa. This was off the Bay of E, no gypos involved at all. Previous owner was an old man - I presume he had a trailer, probably one of those poxy little tin jobs that Hellfrauds sells and can be seen on any given Sunday dangerous bouncing around behind a badly driven and rusting Mondeo, piloted by a white haired fool in the middle land doing 63mph peering over his glasses and steering having an animated discussion with his sleeping wife about the merits of recycled bricks.

Yep that sounds about right lol. I really don't see the point in having a trailer which is no bigger than the Cavalier trunk.. Just lugging a bit of metal on wheels behind the car, totally pointless. The 5ft x 4ft wooden trailer that I had was brilliant, real quiet, couldn't even tell I was towing anything, mind you with a V6 up front, it didn't really mind it lol.

Okay, I'll take the bait... why 'Archer'?!

(BTW, brilliant write-ups!)

No specific reason, I've just finished watching all of Archer at the time and it seemed a better name than any, plus it gives me an excuse to play with graphics. Gives those 'in the know' a grin too.
BTW, if people don't know what Archer is, see: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Archer_(TV_series)

Glad the write ups amuse, I think write ups are more interesting if they are humorous. Although my curious mix of writing channels the spirits of the odd and hatred fuelled: Eddie Izzard and Charlie Brooker. That's all, now go away.*

I'm glad you said that 'Archer' is a TV reference. I was worried that it was a nod to the condition of the car's rear end!